How often do we say out loud (or in our heads), “I forgive you” and add silently afterwards “…you creep!” . Here’s a hint – that’s not effective forgiveness – and holding onto the emotion of resentment or un-forgiveness is harming us. People far wiser than me, liken it to drinking poison and waiting for the other person to die.

Often, we make a conscious decision to forgive and move on, but we forget to tell our subconscious. And the feeling we had of being wronged, or misunderstood, of broken trust or anger stays active under the surface. The problem is that our body regulates and performs from this same subconscious level. So when the operating system is full of negative fuel – we get negative outcomes. Negative feelings can actually make us sick!

The goal of true forgiveness is to change the way the brain responds to the situation. Bio Energetic Synchronization Technique codifies the process of forgiveness into 5 steps. To do them effectively requires time and patience with yourself because you have to be willing to do them with feeling and emotion.

Step 1 – Forgive Yourself – Recognize that you have allowed the event to affect your health by allowing it to ruminate in your conscious and/or subconscious mind.

Step 2 – Forgive the Other Person – We tend to say “I forgive you” flippantly. Really take time to let it go. Do this for you, not for them (they don’t have to know or even be available to you in person).

Step 3 – Give the Other Person Permission to Forgive You – Again, this isn’t about interacting with them. It’s about acknowledging that every story has 2 sides and maybe you played a role you weren’t aware of.

Step 4 – See the Good in the Situation – Everything in life happens for us not to us. Learn the lesson even if it’s as simple as, ‘now I know better what I don’t want’

Step 5 – Be Thankful – Thankful and grateful are hugely powerful emotions. Take a minute to re-frame, and be thankful for the experience and the lesson

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